Rulezzz of the road

The Boyfriend is going for his motorcycle licence (and may I remind you we’re in China!).
First we wanted to get scooter permits, but we decided that motorcycles are so much cooler and sexier.
The first hurdle was to find out the what/where/how of this adventure and as expected this proofed difficult, much of the information on the internet in contradicting and so was advice given by friends. After The Boyfriends failed first attempt to find a driving school with lots of running around and frustrating dead-ends, while I was in the office happily doing absolutely nothing, the second try went very well. So well even that he enriched his stamp collection and is on his way!
After going through the paper mill, during which he collected at least ten stamps (I’m so jealous!), payments were made and now it’s waiting for the appointment to be confirmed.

Earlier, and here we arrive at the actual purpose of this post, we found the questions for the theoretical test in English (You can find these here)
Going through the 800 questions was so hilarious I had to share some of them, so here we go! The motorized vehicle driver __________________.
A. May drive at will when there is no traffic signal
B. Should drive according to the traffic rules and in a safe and courteous manner
C. May drive at will when there is no traffic police
D. May drive according to his habit
Answer: B
(who’s to stop me?) When driving a motorized vehicle on the road, the driver _____________.
A. May not bring the driving license with him
B. May not bring the vehicle license with him
C. Must bring the driving license, the vehicle license and the mandatory insurance with him
D. Should bring the certificate of ex-factory inspection or the certificate of import with him
Answer: C
(…………………..) The driver may drive a motorized vehicle __________________.
A. After drinking alcohol
B. When he suffers from a disease that impedes safe driving
C. When he is exhausted
D. After drinking tea
Answer: D
(How about orange juice?) When encountering sand, hail, rain, snow, fog, ice and other weather conditions, the motorized vehicle should run ___________________.
A. At a fairly high speed
B. Faster than the stipulated maximum speed
C. At the existing speed
D. At reduced speed
Answer: D
(where’s your sense of adventure, man?) When going through a level crossing with traffic signals or a manned level crossing, the motorized vehicle should ______________.
A. Pass at the normal speed
B. Maintain a safe speed
C. Speed up as fast as possible
D. Pass according to the traffic signals or obey the command of the level crossing manager
Answer: D
(if I just go fast enough the train won’t hit me!) When running on a road without traffic signals and encountering pedestrians crossing the road, the motorized vehicle should __________________.
A. Honk to urge the pedestrians to go faster
B. Speed up and pass
C. Reduce speed or stop and yield
D. Bypass
Answer: C
(Run! RUN you pedestrian!!!) When the red traffic light is on, it _________.
A. Means the vehicles are allowed to pass
B. Means the vehicles are prohibited from passing
C. Reminds the vehicles to pass slowly
D. Means the vehicles should stop and yield
Answer: B
(Really? Always?) A motorcycle cannot tow other motorcycles, but it is permitted to be towed by other motorcycles.
Answer: Wrong
(……………………..) People who take a two-wheeled motorcycle should ride it by side way.
Answer: Wrong
(what does that even mean?) If a motorized vehicle causes a road accident and the party runs away, the party is not held full liable for the accident.
Answer: Wrong
(it ain’t illegal if nobody saw it! Whaha run Forrest! Run!) The sign in the picture means _______.
A. Mind side wind
B. Watch for pedestrians
C. The red light is on
D. Mind the traffic lights
Answer: D
(yes, there’s this guy standing next to the sign to put it up every time the light changes. Great job!) When discovering the persons injured in a traffic accident need rescue while driving, the driver should _________.
A. Send the injured persons to hospital in a timely manner or make emergency calls
B. Dodge as much as possible
C. Go ahead by bypassing the scene
D. Find an excuse to dodge the scene
Answer: A
(grammar aside, I think you should just speed up…) In hot weather, the driver may drive a motorcycle bare-backed, barefooted or wearing slippers.
Answer: Wrong
(in warm weather the driver SHOULD drive bare-backed, barefooted AND wearing slippers, especially female drivers) When encountering pedestrians wearing cotton-padded caps or overcoats in winter, the driver should honk and be ready to brake.
Answer: Right
(but only for cotton-padded caps or overcoat wearing pedestrians) When encountering a “watch for children” sign, the driver should speed up and pass in case the children abruptly cross the road.
Answer: Wrong
(really?!) When encountering children playing on the highway, the driver should continuously honk, speed up and pass.
Answer: Wrong
(ah please can I? Can I?!) When encountering slow-moving old people crossing the road, the driver may continuously honk to urge them.
Answer: Wrong
(this is where opinions differ) When entering an express-way toll gate, the driver should select a gate where _______.
A. There are more vehicles
B. The red light is on
C. Service is temporarily suspended
D. The green light is on
Answer: D
(I was wondering why it took so long!)


About alastor993

artist, Art teacher Interests: Drawing, Painting, Experimental film making, writing, philosophy, motorbikes, sleeping!
This entry was posted in Complaints, Life 'n shit and tagged , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

4 Responses to Rulezzz of the road

  1. Joris Roos says: A motorcycle cannot tow other motorcycles, but it is permitted to be towed by other motorcycles.

    This is CLEARLY correct and does not, in no way possible, contradict itself. This is the rule that shall rule them all!

  2. cary, your mother says:

    If the driver’s mistress calls him on the hifgway while his girlfriend is sitting on the back of the mototverhicle, how should the driver respons
    A: throw his telephone with a big smack on the highway
    B: throw his girlfriend ….
    Answer: both possible (it depends how much the telephone costed)

    When the great Jin Yu is flying over, how should the driver respons
    A: call Amnesty International
    B: look for a yellow mountain, try to ride just as high as the greatest flies and say hello
    Answer: both correct (so do both)

    Sorry, I don’t know a thing about trafic …. and telephones

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